We have just bought three one-week old Isa Brown chicks that we plan to grow for laying eggs. After holding one of these fragile little things I cannot imagine how anyone who has held one could possibly put a grown one into a battery cage.
I know there is an efficiency argument for battery cages but can I say fuck off to productivity? Why should we claim productivity, or economic growth, as the overriding consideration?
Everyone who owns a battery farm should be made to spend an hour watching chicks scratch around and interact and learn all the things chicks need to do to survive. Then another hour holding one.
If they still see dollar signs on their heads then there is no saving some people.
Come to think of it, let's make all drivers spend time riding bikes in peak hour inner city traffic before they get their Probationary licence.
And perhaps we could ask every dairy farmer to have their wives forcibly impregnated, not sexually but artificially (I'm not perverted) then the offspring removed after birth and attach metal and plastic pipes to the nother's breasts for a period of time every morning and evening. If they dont reach a certain standard then maybe a hormone that is really only likely to induce mastitis could be administered.
How did I get from holding a baby chicken to that last paragraph?
Tom
So I have to ask: are you planning on eating the eggs these bird produce under compassionate conditions? I can see a whole wonderful world open up for you...hmmm...cakes...omlettes...meals without tofu... ;)
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed. I would eat these eggs. These are going to be the best looked after laying hens. We have named them, hard to mistreat something you have named. We love the names too. They are: Eleanor, Mabel and Rosie. Potentially, they could lay 300 eggs each per year once they start. Probably six months until that happens though.
DeleteWell I know you like movie references, and The Pirate Movie isn't quite Fight Club, but I have to say that I like the name Mabel because she was my favourite movie character when I was a little girl. She frolicked playfully (and a little sexually) on the beach with Christopher Atkins while singing 'First Love'. A preteen girl's dream. Ha ha....And that's what your chicken reminded me of...my brain is a strange island all to itself.
DeleteI didn't realise your aversion to eggs was a conscientious objection. I am proud of you.
ReplyDeleteWould be very happy to come back as a chook at your house. I, in my "ostrich"y way can say only that I buy Free Range eggs only. However, I conceed I am dreamin' if I think this is the perfect life for a chook!